One week

I feel weird, since it's been a long time since I knew for that long that I was pregnant without nothing bad happening. I'm still feeling fine. I checked all my Fertility Friend charts, and I have realized that my miscarriages happened on day 17 post ovulation. That's tomorrow. And other than seeing my therapist, I will sit very still, with my legs crossed, playing Legos with my son from the couch. He will lift them up for me, I'm sure.
And, for the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to walk the baby aisles at Target. And they didn't make me cry. I was able to look at bibs, little spoons, burping cloths and tiny clothes without shedding a tear. I was actually happy. I haven't told almost anyone yet. I told the ladies at ICAN on Sunday, and my two closest friends. We won't tell our families until I'm a few more weeks along, or until little L spills the news, which he almost did while in the phone with my mom yesterday.
Today I have the most difficult task yet. I have to tell my friend S, who has been sharing my infertility journey. I know for experience how hard it is to hear about pregnancies when you cannot have a baby. I know she will be happy for me, but also a little sad. If at least it gives her some hope, I will be fine.