Here goes the 8th

Pregnancy, it is. Because I am pregnant again. I wasn't trying, I wasn't doing OPKs, I wasn't expecting it and I was utterly surprised when I took a test yesterday, 2 days after my period  should have started. I normally know one week earlier, but I seriously didn't think it would happen.

My first reaction was tears. Not joyful tears, but tears of fear. Fear of having to go again through a miscarriage, so soon after the last one. I then decided that fear is like giving up, and I am not giving up on this baby so soon. It sucks that yesterday was Friday, so although I had bloodwork done today I won't have any results until Monday. The wait is excruciating. All my tension sits in my uterus, that feels hard as an apple. And I pee as little as I can because I am scared of seeing blood. Nonecof those things are good for the pregnancy, but there is not much I can do to relax. Sleep would be good. Maybe later. Meanwhile, I'll keep up the hope while rubbing my belly.